Molds

I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I am the most unpredictable person on the planet. I try and surprise as people as much as I can, but that's not always possible. But one thing I tend to pride myself on is not fitting into molds that society tells me I should slide into perfectly.

Between the party girls of Jersey Shore and the squeaky clean Miss Taylor Swift, there isn't a niche for girls like me. I'm the type of girl that can, with the proper food in my stomach, drink like a champ and will dance on tables without a care in the world. I hate passive-aggressive behavior and will get into a fight, and end it, if one of my friends needs backing up. I stick up for what I believe in and am not afraid to piss people off. I'm not afraid of messing around with people, to a limit. I love passionately and live hard.

But I don't fuck around. I don't sleep around without some form, no matter how small, of commitment. I don't flash my tits for anyone who asks. I don't trash talk my friends. I love laying in parks and watching the stars or the clouds. I love to take shopping trips to the local produce store. I can party in a large crowd but I love just sitting and talking to people, one on one.

My views on sexual and romantic attraction are such a contradiction because I'm the girl that wants to be slammed against a wall in the dimly lit hallway of some club or venue and the girl that wants to stay up late, kissing on a couch, watching Disney movies. I want the dirty, crazy heat of sex and the soft passion of romance.

All the romance novels say I should want a bad boy, someone that will ravish me out of my mind, but those boys tend to drive hearts as well as teenagers. They drive fast and hard, but end up crashing them into a wall, walking away to the new one waiting in the driveway. I've dated and loved boys like these and have hardened myself and my heart because of that. But, even with my track record, it's more like a broken record because I tend to repeat my mistakes.

But I can never deal with a total nice guy. I've had that once before and it's like taking home a lost puppy. It's cute when you first take it home, but when you can't get a second alone, it gets to be a burden. I can't stand when guys think you can't do anything for yourself. Thank you very much, but I have two working arms- I can open a door by myself. Being treated to dinner every once in a while is nice, but when I'm not allowed to pay for anything, that's when it gets to be a bit demeaning. I need someone who will break the mold and be an asshole on occasion, but also knows how to treat a girl.

I can break a mold, now I just need the same.

-jrd